As I returned to Notre Dame’s campus in January 2019 for my orientation/immersion week before we began our bi-weekly classes in Chicago for the Master’s of Science in Finance (MSF) program that I had enrolled in, I immediately felt at home. As I walked towards the Grotto to light a candle and say a prayer, I immediately felt a sense of peace and calm. It was like being in a different universe. Reminded of just how deep my love was for my alma mater and the values it instilled in me, I found myself ready to wholeheartedly throw myself into my school work to achieve the level of success and academic excellence that I had strived for during my undergraduate campaign.
Why my plate was so full
After a week of orientation, we returned to our homes and resumed our normal daily lives. Until our next immersion week in July, we’d be attending classes every other Friday and Saturday all day at the Chicago campus. Because this was a full-time graduate program that only lasted a year, a significant amount of content was crammed into each weekend that we had class, and there were exams or projects due almost every class session. I spent my days working more than the standard 8-hour day to try to get ahead but was sure to carve out time almost every day and on the weekends to study and complete my schoolwork. I was very disciplined in my routine so that I could score high in my classes. I felt as if I couldn’t possibly take on any more than I already had on my plate: full-time job, full-time school, and attempts to maintain social life and date.
This went on for about four months, and I was feeling pretty settled into my system. Then, my whole routine got turned upside down when work demands became more intense than usual. On the verge of wanting to quit school to focus on the heavy demands at work, I cautiously confided in Gladys, the supervisor of my new duties, that I was thrilled with my new assignments and responsibilities but wasn’t sure how I was going to manage work and school. She explained that she had been in similar situations while completing her full-time Master’s and that, while it wouldn’t be easy, it could be done.
How I struck a fulfilling balance
The key was to let go of the need for perfection in my schoolwork. She advised me to let work be the priority, but on the days when I was physically at school, I needed to fully immerse myself in my schooling in order to soak in the material, to leverage the networking, and to have a good time and an escape from work. Grades didn’t have to be perfect, though; it would be too much pressure and too much to take on. What I quickly realized was that most of my classmates were feeling the same way working high pressure jobs or owning their own businesses. Graduate school was just different than undergraduate programs for that reason.
Trusting Gladys, I took my foot off the gas a bit for school and put my foot hard on the accelerator at work. Lightening up on my discipline towards school felt uneasy at first, but I quickly developed a new routine where I had shifted my balance between work and school while still reaping significant benefits from school. This new balance allowed me to:
- devote all the time I needed to work,
- still achieve high marks in school while learning a lot of content and soft skills,
- not only attend but be part of two weddings that summer, and
- actually go on various dates.
While I did admittedly feel exhausted most of the time, 2019 turned out to be one of my favorite years. I had a blast whenever I was at school, indulged in various social experiences, and had the opportunity to work with high-achieving, focused, and fun colleagues. My growth as a person that year was exponential. And to come full circle, I was still able to finish with admirable grades and learned a large amount of content throughout the program that was immediately applicable to my job.
While 2019 was one of the most challenging years I’ve had, it was also one of the most rewarding. It became so fruitful and gratifying after I was able to learn and apply a few lessons:
1. It’s unhealthy to try to be perfect at everything all the time
When your plate starts to feel too full, you need to assess your priorities and balance your time accordingly. That doesn’t mean that you need to start taking everything besides your top priority off your plate, you just need to manage your time proportionally.
2. Be present in the moment.
While I backed down the amount of time I spent on school on the days I didn’t have class, I did my best to be fully present and engaged in my coursework and with my cohort on the days I did have class. This led me to still gain everything I had hoped for and more out of my MSF.
3. Surround yourself with a strong, supportive crew
If I didn’t have the full support of my family, friends, colleagues, and classmates throughout my MSF program, I would have never made it through. Each group supported me through the various areas I needed to devote my time to. My efforts, whether academic or professional, were enjoyable because of those I was surrounded by.
While this journey taught me a lot about letting go of some of my perfectionism tendencies, this is an aspect of myself that I’ve continued to work on as different scenarios pop up throughout my life.
If you’re feeling like this journey of overcoming perfectionism/hyper-achievement, tapping into your authenticity, and following your heart resonates with you, I invite you to subscribe to my mailing list so that you never miss any valuable content or inspiration.
Disclaimer: This blog should not be construed as providing, or intending to provide, professional financial, legal, psychological, or other professional advice. It is simply meant to share my experiences for those that may find them relatable and helpful.